Vision in flux

I have had 2 years with no major developments with my vision.  I have done a ton (it really feels like that much) of rehabilitation, retraining, and adaptation.  And silly me I thought maybe we were in the clear.  I have had this disease/condition/syndrome since 1990.  I used to go many years between episodes.  As a matter of fact I usually would have new treatment options each time this thing reared its ugly head again. However, I seem to be in a more “chronic” stage vs. acute flare ups here and there. Last week my scar in my good eye (a scar from argon laser treatment back in the day) spontaneously expanded. I noticed said expansion on May 24^th, and now on June 7^th, I can barely read the 20/100 line. My vision is now ALL peripheral vision.  I appear to have no central vision.  The good news is I have spent the good part of the last 2 years retraining my eyes to pull more into the peripheral vision that adaptation hopefully won’t take too long.   I see both a low vision specialist and my retina specialist next week, so hopefully that will give me more information.  However, right here right now in the midst of this completely grey unknown reality I am back to the task of literally living one day at a time.  The idea of a 6 month, 1 year, 5 year or 10 year plan have been a long ago luxury I no longer have.  If I reach beyond “today” and start to worry about what my future is going to look like I am going to stop breathing and seriously freak out.  When I get up in the morning it is like “wow, my vision really stinks…can you live with this ‘just for today’”.  This technique has gotten me through some of the most insane chaos in my life, because I pretty much get do what needs to be done and deal with the disability in one day increments.  This condition is a lot like being pulled out in a rip tide and then  you do everything you have been trained to do to get back to shore, and just about the time you start breathing normal again and taken a few small steps on solid ground the next rip current drags you out to sea.  This condition takes stamina, courage and perseverance that taxes your physical, mental, and spiritual well-being. Thankfully, with the support of friends and family I am able to keep going. The experience of the previous times really helps with each subsequent trip out to the deep blue sea.